On to the Next

Hawskley Workman.



I continue to be consumed with desire for this man. And that desire permeates every level of desire that a human can feel. I was trying to explain to a friend the appeal of Hawksley, and for me it is that tension between his sweet, romantic, chill inducing songs that are whispered softly, as if he is in bed with a lover and his lusty, salacious songs that bring out the carnal desires of even the most virginal prudes. If we are honest, all women are looking for just that from their men. We want our men to be sensitive, listen to our deep thoughts, tuck stray hair behind our ears, while looking into our eyes, telling us soulful romantic things that make us melt at their touch and then in the next moment, turn on the swagger, call us nasty names and make us feel like objects of sexual desire. Its a delicate balance.
A balance that Workman has down.


Besides his talent at song writing, I just listened to an interview with him. He's a smart guy! He was getting into some thangs that really resonated with me, its funny how the universe is connected in such a weird majestic puzzle that you hear interviews, or songs, or read a book at the exact right time, right when you need answers, or suggestions, or need to know that you aren't alone. Let me see if I can explain what Workman said in his interview, as it is eerily similar to everything that has been on my mind lately:





As a child, you are breed to believe that one day, you will arrive. You will find your niche, and there will you stay. You will go to school, find a career that defines you, know what your 'calling" is and be eternally happy in you little niche in the world. Parents antagonize this belief system by asking children "what do you want to be when you grow up?", or by telling kids that "God has an amazing plan for your life". Unfortunately, the older you get, the more questions there seems to be, not more answers.

All this to say, as an adult, coming to the harsh reality that maybe there isnt a huge exciting plan for your life gives you two choices in how to respond. You can choose to constantly loath over the fact that this "life" you have been waiting for is never coming. Or you can choose to see the fact that this fantasy life you imagined up for yourself is not going to turn out, and that that is a blessing in disguise. In this latter mind set you will begin to see that by constantly try to progress, intentionally never arriving, you are pushing yourself to always be something new, something different, something transcended. I would never want to wake up and feel complacent. I would never want to feel completely satisified with where I am spirtually, or emotionally or relationally. To be complacent with life, to feel as though you have "arrived" is to give up; give up on feeling deserving of something better, something new, somethings more authentic to who you are. I vow to always push myself, to never settle for status quo, for good enough, for almost. I want to be consistantly, as Jay-Z would say, on to the next....

I now hope that I never arrive, that I am always, as Jay-z would say, "on to the next".